Why did the lizard go on a diet?
It weighed too much for its scales.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
Why couldn't the sailors play cards?
Why do math teachers love hiking?
Why was the geometry book so adorable?
What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving?
What did the golfer dad want for Father's Day?
What restaurant is on time for every meeting?
Why are elephants so wrinkled?
What do you call a fish without an eye?
What do you call a pig that's been arrested for bad driving?
Why did the car excuse himself from the dinner party?
What's a frog's favorite drink on a hot summer day?
Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor & Gamble?
What do snowmen always order from Wendy's®?
What happens to a dog that keeps eating bits off of the table?
What do you call the story of The Three Little Pigs?
How do musicians show off on St. Patrick's Day?
Why are monkeys lousy workers?
Why do potted plants shower so much in April?