Where do you go when you need an excuse to get out of something?
A lie-brary.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Why did the clock get removed from the library?
What's the most talkative class period in high school?
What does a bear cub call its grandfather?
What do you call a thieving alligator?
Why couldn't the pepper go to archery practice?
What's the most expensive plate in church?
Where do people who pass gas in church sit?
Why did the cow cross the road?
What do insects learn at school?
Why is it a bad idea to get married by the Pacific Ocean?
I'm not a bad putter.
Why was the stadium steaming hot after the game?
Why was the pickle self-conscious?
When is a black dog not a black dog?
Why was the pirate late for work?
My wife said I should do some lunges to stay in shape.
Which elf is the best singer?
Did you hear about the pope's wardrobe issue?
What's a fish's favorite outdoor activity?